mood swings.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011



i feel like i've been a bit MIA this week on the blog. some weeks i'm on top of my shit, and some weeks i'm not. some weeks i'm all, "i'm gonna do great things with my career." other weeks it's more like, "what the ef am i doing with my life?"

the changing of seasons has always made me anxious in the sense that it reminds me: we are only moving forward. i don't always feel like i'm moving forward as well. more like a stand still.

ed may be the most optimistic person i know, and i wish i could be more like him in that sense. i'd say my optimism button is in the ON position 4 days out of the week. that's about the best i can do. what's with the mood swings?

ps: i wrote this post using the blogpress app for iPad. never used it before. here's hoping this doesn't look like a 2 year old took over my blog.

25 comments:

Ellie said...

Hi, thanks for coming over and commenting on my blog. I've like looking at your pictures of N.Y.

B. in the Know said...

So glad to know I am not the only one that can be motivated one second and then the next totally lacking direction and optimism!
Much love,
B

la petite coquine said...

John is like you-seriously affected by a new season, and I'm the optimistic Ed. Every couple needs both or you'd both be drunk in the dark or grinning like idiots.

And you're pretty awesome, even if you don't always feel like it. You are moving forward, but sometimes it takes a while to find out where you're headed.

stephanie said...

Hitting autumn always freaks me out a little. Getting a little closer to the end of another year...even though time is always ticking, year end always seems like a deadline for things. I know my productivity is going to drop because I'm going to be trying to hibernate. I'm trying to embrace that rather than dread it.

skim said...

I have been feeling at a stand still since I've moved here. It's funny to say because clearly establishing oneself in a new city, especially a huge and intimidating city like New York, could be seen a huge step forward. However, I feel like I should be doing more. I guess I've always felt that way - always making sure I have some kind of plan or timeline to help move me forward and to work towards some kind of goal. If things come up that are unexpected or not accounted for it doesn't really matter. Just the idea of working for something is enough, you know? Currently I have a loose plan for the future but things are too much in the abstract to motivate me toward them. I know it's cyclical and that in due time I'll be ready to spring into action but at the moment I feel a little bit like a slug. A nearly 32 year old slug that is somehow convincing everyone around her that she's got her shit together. !!!!

Mrs. Parker said...

I can completely relate. And I'm married to one of the world's most optimistic people. He's so generally happy that people call him the "Happy Hawaiian." But glad to see that I'm not alone...

SJ said...

you'll be happy to know your blog doesn't look like it was taken over by a 2 year old.

I've been feeling like this a lot lately too, i guess my brain is trying to tell me something?

but thank you for your honesty. it's easy to assume that everyone in blog land has their shit figured out ALL the time (even though in the back of your mind you know that can't possibly be true). enjoy your 4 days of positivity, at least it's the majority of your week :)

Lori said...

agree with previous comments.. your post definitely doesn't look like a 2 year old wrote it ;)

and my optimism button is on less than yours throughout the week, so i'd say you're doing pretty well for yourself. in fact, today is one of my off days, so i am refusing to write in proper grammar, like using capital letters. ha.

love your blog! new follower, please stop on by:
http://penelopeblue.blogspot.com/

Kelly said...

I feel the same way as you do about the passing of time. I feel like I'll never get my life together some days...

Katy said...

I have a hard time staying optimistic and positive and my husband is the MOST positive and optimistic person I have ever met! It's rough sometimes but thanks to him I have learned to let the little things go.. an i'm workin on the big thing! Stay tough and true to yourself... mood swings and all!

Audrey said...

Hi Becca, your honesty is so refreshing. I read your blog because it's not just another perfect house with perfect kids and perfect parties, etc. It's real. I read this and my immediate thought was, "Oh, thank GOD I'm not the only one!". Looking over some of the other comments....seems I'm not the only one who thought that.

Courtney said...

Ive had a lot of the same problem. Things seem to be groovy and then suddenly, I'm all outta whack. Usually with my schedule. Can't get into a routine. And it's made me moody, though I just try to go with the flow. Hope it gets better for you!

Gracie said...

I think we all go through this. I still feel that way now but I think I have found a little bit more direction in my life.

Thanks for coming by my blog :)

rebecca said...

thanks for the feedback guys. good to know i'm not the only one who's high on life 1 day, and down the next.

also, blogpress app for ipad is pretty awesome! except it distorted the pic a bit?

Petra said...

don't worry. you are not alone. same here. for years. I just start to make peace with it, trying to find ways to deal with it instead of trying to fundamentally change who I am. I'd love to be more even-tempered, optimistic all the time, more outgoing. but it's not going to happen. and that is fine!

Chudney Thomas said...

You are not alone.

Caitlin said...

Season shifts always leave me feeling bummed, I panic a bit about it all moving so quickly. And in general I feel like I take on much more of the woe-is-me stuff than my husband, who, like Ed, is the most optimistic person I've ever known. I actually like the pic like that, it's a fuzzy mood swings kind of photo. So, nicely done ipad distortion!

Rebeka said...

I am totally having the same perpetual freakout. You're definitely not alone. And your blog does not (and never has) look like it was taken over by a 2 year old, don't worry :)

Mo Pie, Please said...

Girl, do I TOTALLY understand! And your blog looks more polished than a rich lady's silver in the 60s.

Leah said...

I am pretty sure we all have the same ups and downs like that. Sometimes I am so ambitious and make all these like plans for myself...and then I go home and sit on my couch :)

xo L.

laura said...

I've been checking out your blog for awhile and love it! Change of seasons get me everytime too....hang in there you will find your motivation.

Jennifer Rod said...

i totally get you. i've been having one of those weeks too and just this morning i was like, what's up with the mood swings? maybe it is the changing season, except in the sunshine state seasons dont really change...

Brandi {not your average ordinary} said...

I don't feel like I've been on top of things for some time. But I keep trying. That's what counts, right?

kitchu said...

fall always makes me all nostalgic and melancholy. the smell of the air, while it sort of awakens something in me- gets me almost excited for something i can't name, also reminds me of the past- family holidays, and all the things that will never be again, all the things lost.

and why are you moody? well, i can spell it for you, if you allow: h-o-r-m-o-n-e-s. we are women. we are wired this way. and it sucks. i'd suggest a total abdominal hysterectomy if you weren't so young. heh. i've got my ticket and am waiting in that line as i type this.

Karen said...

I just have to tell you - I love your blog! And this post is definitely one I can relate to. This feeling of "uhhh... now what?" keeps cycling through my head with each season change along with this silly anxiety at not having all the answers at 32. Recognizing those days for what they are is half the battle, isn't it.

Post a Comment

ShareThis